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acceptance
March 2009 
The Most Effective Way to Change the World
Posted on Jul 22nd, 2007
by 
Mushin
Mushin
High Five (St. Peter & Dante by William Blake)
Wow... that's really a headline - xxpressing what it is we're going for here, isn't it?
Well, one extremely effective way to not only change the world but yourself as well is:
Changing the World one smile at a time.
If today we all make at least three strangers smile - maybe by a nice remark, maybe by smiling at them from our heart of hearts , maybe by offering them a helping hand - and commit ourselves to doing that every day... we will be spreading a lot of the "good stuff".
La Vierge, L' Enfant Jesus et Saint Jean Baptist by William Bougu
Doing what you want to do with all your heart.What do you really want to do now? I ask myself this question in many situations...
Entering a restaurant I ask, "Were do I really feel like sitting?" and then I go there.
Talking with someone I take a moment asking myself, "What would I really like to talk about?" and then I do that or steer the conversation in that direction.
Standing in a grocery store I ask, "What would I really like to cook tonight?" and then I buy that. (Hey girls, you can do that with shoes too :-) )
You might say, "But often - in my work for instance - I have to do all kinds of things I don't want to do." Well, I'm not going to advise you to find the work you really want to do - you might not be ready to live this so radically, yet; we all go step by step, don't we? So I'll give you the advice I have been following for some time before I could muster the strength to actually live this way all day long; it come from Neil Young (I think):
Simple, effective, and causing lasting changes in your body-mind and the environment around you. Bringing your heartfelt presence to this moment and giving yourself truly, madly, deeply to what your doing (or not-doing for the Taoists among us) will not only be a blessing and change you on the cellular, psychological and spiritual level it is also already reflecting the world we want to live in, doesn't it?If you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with.
Moreau - Detail
And one last 'thing' you can do for yourself and with friends as well - I have been doing this with the participant of my recent 7 day seminar "The Art of Being Happy".
Take time to reflect on what you are really good at (and allow yourself to consider everything you're good at).What would happen if you told your friends today, "I really love it how you can ..." or, "I think you're a real master of ..." or some such thing?
What if once in a while you got a little circle together with the expressed purpose of telling each other what you are good at, and help each other see even more things that you're good at?
You might even want to tell us here in the comments.... :-)
Night with Her Trail by Edward Robert Hughes
Access: PublicTagged with: between-us, spiritual practice, change, self-realisation, evolution, acceptance, enquiry, development, we-culture, smile
Hello Mushin! Very lightening post! I love the William Blake! Heat lifting :)
Ahhh… its the simple things that have such a profound effect and impact on my life. And the simplicity in your post is beautiful Mushin. Thanks for the uplifting suggestions.
:)
This is a wonderful blog Mushin, some beautiful reminders to be aware and show you care…
:)
Aley
Oh, Mushin! What a post. I've already passed it on. Thank you so much.
And you know what? No matter how deeply I think I know these things, the reminder is always helpful. So don't hestitate to keep reminding. :)
Every authentic tear, pain or great doubt can do the same.
Strategic smiles -practiced by cultic scientologists or other ones - can be manipulative.
:):)
Well, from long years of experience and practise in these ways (especially “if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with”) I find that “authenticity” is way overrated…
:))
And, may I quote Albert, to you :) “Scientologists can be learned from how to make things happen and getting results.”
All strategic smiles are manipulative - actually most of human behaviour is.
I have no problem with that - matter of fact, as a therapist I do that all the time… manipulate people to see beauty I see in them, for - one tiny - instance.
Yes, creating effective change is all about manipulation, counter-manipulation and finding out what a real, integral and beautifuly true flow could possibly mean…
:):)
Hi Mushin,
This is my first visit to your blog, and I'm compelled to comment. I loved your post. Yet, I have a completely different point of view concerning your comment.
Authenticity, in my opinion, is not overrated. In being authentic, I create an opportunity for others to emotionally bond with me and trust me. In being authentic, I can disagree and hold no judgement, which brings depth to relationships.
I don't smile strategically. I smile out of joy or happiness. I disagree that 'most of human behavior' is manipulative, also. We do form our opinions from experiences. I find it sad that you feel you must manipulate your clients for them to see who they essentially are. That approach would not help me through a traumatic experience, rather it would leave me feeling alienated and possibly perpetuate the trauma.
So we disagree. LOL We are what makes the world go round!
Peace,
Wendy
Well, I appreciate very much what you say.
Authenticity implies that one can know who one truly is, what is a true expression of who I am in this moment…
With overrated I mean to point out that sooo many times in my life I have said / heard people say, “This is just the way I am, take it or leave it…” (or something of the kind). Or - very hip among Osho-Sannyasins, “This doesn't really feel true for me this moment.”
The “religion of authenticity” is what I was pointing at - not very clearly - in my comment.
Strategic smiles are all smiles that are not expressing what you are pointing out… and it's beautiful that you would never smile when you're not joyful or happy, but just to appease or soothe or make a good impression or get a bigger tip or…
We obviously have a different understanding of manipulation - from my point of view we do not form our opinions from experiences but from what we make of our experiences, how we interpret them.
So if someone insists that they are, say, “not good enough” and I skillfully get them to see that indeed they are master in some sense also, I manipulate them into seeing that.
I'm somehow a born optimist, that is, I am able to see the good in very difficult situations that others tend to call bad (which is what I make of a very long experience in working with people). Now doing some artful things often I can make people laugh and smile at things they were formerly afraid of. That's the kind of manipulation I'm talking about.
And really, I have no idea what it means “who people essentially are”. I know that really a lot depends on how I see them - so if I'm in an irritated mood (which hardly happens anymore, but it does… and I do remember how it used to be) I cannot see light and beauty where usually I can see it.
You obviously haven't worked a lot with people in traumatic experiences to so easily judge what helps people 'out'. It's mysterious to me at how exactly it works but determination seems to play a role, skillful manipulation of the way they see and interpret that 'traumatic experience' that bothers them so much, and then a lot of love.
You seem to believe that manipulation and love can't go together - if those kids in your photo gallery are yours then you certainly know how to manipulate your children out of being stuck in some fit…
So authenticity has a good name and manipulation a bad one - but considered a bit closer both terms loose some of their aura, don't they?
Thank you, Wendy, for disagreeing…
Love,
mushin
:-)
All I meant with 'who people essentially are' is that we are all equal, we are all love, we are all good (in some capacity). We are all connected and have the same roots. That is all I meant.
My previous comment about trauma… I was only speaking from my personal point of view.
After re-reading both your comments… I think we are basically saying the exact same thing with much different language. For me… if trauma were to happen… I would not be a candidate for this particular kind of therapy. I think I would get frustrated.
But what Would work… is if a therapist worked from a teaching mode. Teaching me how to see a different perspective or perhaps the Whole perspective. And this is how I parent my kids. I don't manipulate them, I teach them differences and allow them the freedom to make mistakes and understand natural consequences.
LOL And if my kids are ever stuck in a fit…. I leave them to it. I don't work from a re-action basis, which teaches them not to manipulate, as well.
So I think I still disagree! ?? LOL So much is lost in translation via post and comment… it is hard to tell. ;-)
Have a good one!!
~Wendy
Lovely way of disagreeing… using different concepts we apparently arrive at similar actions.
Isn't that a beautiful message in itself?
Maybe that is because we are moving along the lines that Helen pointed out.
May your days be filled with wonder and joy,
Mushin
The difference in the personal felt sense of the words 'manipulate' and 'teach/coach/mentor/guide” are huge. We could say 'let us exploit the client to his/her fullest potential by manipulation and stretegic plunder and violation of his willfulness to not change, raping and robbing him of his troubles and abandoning him to his Highest Self'….but that would sound violently riduculously riduculing, no?
When I use and understand the word 'manipulate' it would mean an action or set of actions enacted to trick another or many others into believing that one is acting for the good, while ensuring action of the other benefit only the manipulator. Perhaps we could rape and pillage this issue further? :)
Thank you Johann for clarifying by exaggerating.
I come from a long life of being an agent provocateur for mysticism and the One Pluralistic Life. Hoping that by doing so people would understand better what is happening… and so now, when it's time for a whole new ballgame sometimes I play it by my “habitual rules”.
Thank you Wendy & Johann in helping me get this clarified.
Thank you. I am really impressed by what you have said and I will try to put more of that thinking and way of acting in my life.
Beautiful!
That'll work! ;-)
It takes all ways, my friend…and this is a positive one ;-)
I smile at everyone!!! LOL…and I don't make myself do it….I can't help it, LOL…People call me Smiley, LOL…
Keep up the good work! Be the change ;-)
Yes, it works… and yes, it takes all ways - well maybe not, but who knows :-)
Great it comes to you naturally; I had to do it for some months (I think 2 1/2) before it came to me naturally… now I can't stop smiling!
There are many ways to express positivity…What matters is that we do THAT. ;-)
When you find Joy within, there is no “manipulative smiles” (Hahaha…that's funny)…you express it naturally! It just ooooozes out of you ;-)
You made me smile reading this post and the discussion. :) Such simple, beautiful little things will change the world, for it is my inner world, my viewer that shifts with a smile and brings light to my soul.
Thanks for this reminder. :)